Hello all,
Its been a while since I posted, and I apologise about that.
A lot of things of happened since my last blog post, I have started my first term at College for one thing. I am studying English Literature/Language, Creative Writing, Psychology and History. I guess you could say I have my work cut out for me with doing 4 (and a half in my opinion) subjects but at first I wanted to do 5, but I needed a grade point average (because I forgot England was slowly becoming America) of 6.5 and due to my D in art, I only got a 5.67 :/ I worked out that if I had not taken art at GCSE, my grade point average would have been 6.7? How pissed was I you ask? Oh, very. Very pissed was this little ginger. I don't know what annoyed me more to be honest, the fact that if I had not pursued a pointless subject that will not only get me nowhere in life because I both failed it, and its pointless, but the fact that I probably failed because I managed to piss off the entire art department before I left by accusing them of being filled with bullshit - which they were by the way. Each teacher had a different approach and a different level on leniency towards the rules of the exam and in my opinion if the head of the department is willing to let his students get away with three extra days of being able to work on their books, then the rest of the department should follow suit. What they shouldn't do is accuse me of lying about the information that I was given, from the head of the department and their students, then go in shouting at their boss about how he's breaking the rules, in front of his class, pushing him into a corner so he then felt compelled to lie to her face and then attempt to punish the students who had "broken the rules" even though he gave them the go ahead. Fucking ridiculous is that school. That's why I couldn't stand to stay there another minute, never mind go to its shitty sixth form.
In all fairness, I'm sure the Sixth Form that Southy has to offer is top notch, even though Ofsted keep coming back year after year telling them that they're "satisfactory" and they need to improve. I'm sure that even though they have about 10 rooms and the same amount of teachers that treat you like you're still that little 11 year old that first walked through the door of that shithole of a secondary school that they can teach to a standard that the students deserve. I mean for god's sake, it tried for so long to become a "technology college" and they spent loads of money fitting that bloody sign claiming that they are, but unfortunately they lost their lovely title because their technology was shite and now they are only a school, but ironically, they cant afford to take the sign down so it still says "South Holderness Technology College" in massive, fake, obnoxious letters. I makes me laugh out loud just thinking about it. To be honest though, I can't really hate on a Sixth form that I don't attend, I can only hold judgement against it as I know most of the members of staff, how it poorly operates and the fact that it managed to keep hold of the majority of my friends.
I went to another college, knowing that to a point I wouldn't have any friends coming with me from southy, although for a while I did think that some were joining me, but they changed their minds at the last minute. I did realise, from the beginning, when I made the choice to go out and actually try and get a decent education rather than just settling for something easy, that I would have to make new friends so I could have some sort of social life while at college. But foolishly, I thought that the friends that I have spent the past five years with, would still be there through it all. I don't have trouble making friends, I never have done and I never will. But the fact is I miss the friendship unit I used to have, even if it was fucked beyond belief. Everyone that comes from southy is childish and pathetic and thinks that the world revolves around them when it comes to their stupid little problems like who does what with who, and who fancies who, and whatever else they think is worth anyone's time, but you would have thought that going into college would maybe make them realise that this is time to grown up? apparently not. The people at my college are lovely, everyone is nice, they are mature and they don't care about any childish bullshit you would associate with being at secondary school. but the students that came form southy and are now in college? still childish as fuck. I really don't care if you read this and think this applies to you and get offended, because the fact is that if you do get offended, then obviously the shoe fits. I watched this theory form in front of my eyes in the past few weeks, and it really was unbelievable. Funny as hell to think about, that how southy treats like you such a child you can't actually grow out of it. so much for setting us up for the future. HA.
I feel like I'm being left behind by my "friends" even though I'm the one who left? Maybe I deserved that, rejected because I bothered to try and move on. Although its ironic because if I had truly moved on, not seeing them or them not bothering to try wouldn't really affect me. and yet it does. Maybe its me who's to blame for not trying, maybe because I applied past experience to current events and decided that if they did care, they would bother, that its terribly back fired and they're waiting for me? But no, I've attempted on a number of occasions but to no avail. I guess I'll take the message and go, haha. I'll go back to all my "friends" at college, who consist of a few people from southy who I didn't really talk to at all when I was actually at southy, and a few people who are friends with Finn. That's kinder cheating though isn't it? using his friends instead of making my own? ;) Well I wouldn't but because everyone is so nice and polite, they don't stick around long enough to actually form friendships, they form quick conversations that get them through the lesson. which is fine, but when you miss people who also claim to miss you but make little effort, and have the nice benefit of actually being around friends, you can't help but feel lonely and a little bit pissed off.
Oh and another thing that's really pissing me off...teenage pregnancy and everyone's nonchalant attitude towards it. what is it with everyone our age and younger that decide its actually okay to get pregnant and to go through with it? what the hell happened to parents teaching their kids about respecting themselves and that abortion actually is an option, although getting pregnant in the first place isn't? What makes it worse is when these girls post pictures of their scan and put it as their cover photos on facebook and they tag their "baby-daddies" in status' about how happy they are that they're having a baby together at 14/15 and that its gonna be called some ridiculous three barreled name that derives from inspiration from the Jezza Kyle show and their parents comment about how proud they are. who the fuck would be proud of their underage child giving birth to something that they still are themselves? It physically sickens me to see how excited they get because they think that mummy and daddy are gonna take care of it all and they don't need an education or to get a job, because the state will pay for all their iphones and gucci shoes and their xbox games and Nike fucking trainers and they carry on going out every night screaming yolo and getting pregnant/impregnating more people without a care in the world because mummy is sat at home looking after their little gifts that they unlovingly and indeservably put on this earth. A baby is something you want to have when you have a stable and loving family unit of your own, when you're married and have a stable career and you know for a fact that you and your partner are able to support and love that child for the rest of your lives. not when you can't even manage to stay with your boyfriend/girlfriend because its "too much hassel babe I just need ma space innit" and you have to rely on your parents to look after it while you go out on the piss. And don't even fucking dare try and lecture anyone who slags you off for being a stupid slut, because you are not mother of the year like you think you are, and yes, we do know what you're going through because for the past 9 fucking months you've been letting us all know through every social networking site going. you are not giving birth to the son of god and stop thinking you're part of some special "teen mums alliance" because you're not, you people are not special and you do NOT deserve my sympathy or my smiling acknowledgement of this amazing "achievement" you think you've accomplished. you're just a silly child who thinks that getting pregnant or impregnating every desperate tramp that's willing to let you is a good way to start adulthood. If you would like some sort of acclamation though, then here it is: Congratulations on ruining the rest of your life. Can't wait for when I get a job because I managed to go to school and I have to pay for you dole money. Have fun, Much love xoxo
I guess I've just spent this post ranting and getting a few things off my chest. I'd apologise for that as well but this is my blog and I think I can put whatever I want within reason. When ranting I don't name names, that's vindictive and pathetic on my part if I did, especially because I'm being so generic with my rants. But someones you just want to, it can't be helped ;) But I shan't. I'm too British for that sort of thing. ;)
I also turned 17 last month! I'm well old ;) And I have a student card that lets me get discount, such as free Mcflurries when I buy a meal at MaccyD's. With these mammoth saving I don't know what I'll do next! Maybe I'll buy a car, so if I want to see my Dad I don't have to wait for him to get a job or to rely on Carole to come and get me cause Dad's too busy. I could just drive there! How wondrous would that be! Instead of seeing him only at Christmas and waiting for his calls that only ever come if Nanna challenges his parenting or its my birthday. And I wouldn't have to get the bus with all the other peasants every morning! I wouldn't have to pay £29.00 a fucking week just to get to college on a bus that's full of retards and smells of STDs and piss. It would be so much easier, and yet probably more expensive? shame really.
I must say that my rants relieve stress that I have evidently been bottling up and as Tim Minchin calls likes to call them in his poem Storm, "rare, but fun rants", that's how I like to view them hehe :) Well, they're fun for me anyways, if you enjoy them, then that's just a bonus :)
I'm gonna go for now though, I've got college in morning and we wouldn't want me not at my full potential? ;)
P.S. Shout out for Finn who's idea it was of a ranting blog post to happen! This^^ Was all his idea ;) hehe, Thanks babes :) <3
That's all folks,
Over and out;)xxxxxx<3
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